please enjoy this rant.

HEY we just had a revelation. Seriously. We can remember all the time when we were younger how we would see flyers for an afterparty for nearly every big show that came through town. We’re not just talking about the DJ and dance stuff (especially considering there are many well done after-parties in that scene going on all ready) but in rock and roll in general. Why was that? Or rather, why doesn’t that happen here (you guessed it, it wasn’t in this city). Well, for one, we would bet it’s the whole geographic proximity thing. Although, in a sense, that’s kinda bunk because you can catch a ride from Verizon or House of Blues down to someplace like the Mink or Notsuoh or Art Storm with a minimum of effort. What was the name of that club that got siezed by the Feds because it was a front for an X ring? The one with $1 cape cods on Wednesdays? We feel like we maybe went to some parties there. Maybe it’s the fact that no show here is able to end before 1:30 am, and most people don’t want to go to a warehouse that late (since, you know, bars will be closed). Does anyone know what time shows end at House of Blues? Can someone please put together an afterparty for the Andrew Bird date? KTHNX.

FRIDAY
Wild Moccasins CD Release Show with Buxton, Teenage Kicks, DJs ADR and BDM
You can get our full-sentence show and tell about this event from a post earlier this week, but essentially you’re going to get 1) a copy of the cd with your cover, 2) a Homopolice CDr cover of a Wild Moccasins song if you are one of the first 25 to ask for one, 3) a screened poster for the show if you are one of the first 50 in the door, 4)a hand-screened t-shirt with a design only available at this show, if you bring your own t-shirt, 5)Free pizza, 6)Free cupcakes, 7)three super good bands, 8 ) two NEXT LEVEL djs, who have the ability to decide if they want to play ‘Cool it Now’ as a radio single or an extended mix. Party. All Ages.

Grupo Fantasma, Vallejo, Yoko Mono @ Warehouse Live
Sometimes we feel really bad for Yoko Ono. I mean, one minute you’re just some avant garde artist who meets a guy named John, and the next thing you know a bunch of goofball Canadians are writing a song about you and then the bass player from Chango Jackson has done a little twistaroo with it and is now opening up for someone nominated for a Grammy (Grupo Fantasma) or an alt-rock outfit that ~swooon~ all the AEPhi girls liked in college. I mean, you think Yoko herself is hanging out backstage with any Grammy nominees tonight? We’re gonna go ahead and say the the little word written on the ceiling once you climb the ladder and view through the magnifying glass is ‘no.’

ALSO
The Caprolites, Battle Rifle and 50-50 @ The White Swan
KRS One @ The Meridian

SATURDAY
Leave Your Genre at the Door 2: Grandfather Child, Fat Tony, Satin Hooks, Heptic Skeptic, Nosaprise, Perseph-One and News on the March @ Fitzgeralds
YUS! We always love it when there are shows we like at Fitz. We love that place. Sue us. This second installment of Leave Your Genre at The Door features a hunk a hunk a burning indie rock and rap, including many of our favorites. As a heads up Grandfather Child, a project featuring Lucas G (Satin Hooks) and Ryan Chavez (Panic in Detroit) is playing, not Sad Gorilla (Lucas solo) as has been seen promoted in most places. BONUS: LSPS (the band formerly known as Lone Star Porn Star) is headlining the show upstairs, and that should be fun.

Saturday is also an evening of many many ‘events’, including Downtown Pavilion for the HYPA Fire + Ice Gala featuring Glasnost, Houston Music Revival, featuring Memphis May Fire, Runner Runner, Before…There Was Rosalyn, Driver F, Scarlett O’Hara, A Kid Named Thompson, Visceral, Otenki, Novista, Skyscrapers Walk Among Us, Love She Wrote, Bonnie Blue and Set It Off @ The Meridian and Houston Press Artopia, featuring Sideshow Tramps, Karina Nistal, Arthur Yoria, Houston Metropolitan Dance Company, Dominic Walsh Dance Theater, Travesty Dance Group, & more @ Winter Street Studios

Wana keep it on the noise tip? be sure to hit up Future Blondes, Venison Whirled, Concrete Violin, Kairos and Amputee @ Notsuoh

FRIDAY
If you’re a fan of the kind of things like Vinyl Ranch, Wednesday nights at Big Star Bar, most of Dusti Rhodes’ outfits and 97.1 FM, then tonight is your night. Except that you have to choose. Where’s the morton’s salt girl? The Derailers have a set going at Goode’s Armadillo Palace, which is the building next to Goode Co. BBQ on Kirby. Yes, you can enjoy ribs, brisket and all the trimmings for dinner and then walk across the street to catch their set.

Junior Brown

Hardly seems fair to everyone else, frankly. Perennial favorite, Austin redeemer, master of the Guit-Steel and Dukes of Hazard-remake narrator Junior Brown brings his timeless take on country to the Mucky Duck of all places – be sure not to dance. Why not The Continental, may you ask? Well, because fellow keep it weirders The Gourds are headlining there this evening, along with Molly and the Ringwalds. Not enough choices for ya? Local Western Swing queen Miss Leslie will be playing with her Juke Jointers at Aubrey’s.

Let’s say you’re looking for an act that picks the cat-gut, but leans more towards the bluegrass and old timey breakout of things. Well, turns out you too are strikin it rich thanks to the good folks over at the Free Press, who are having a party to celebrate their 2008 Worst of Houston Issue. The Sideshow Tramps are at the top of that bill, along with Come See My Dead Person and Robert Ellis. It’s taking place at Avante Garden, and if you bring a T-Shirt they’ll have a screen on hand to create you own, handmade, Worst of Houston souvenir. Could be worse.

Also
Hunger Project Benefit, featuring Sybil, Skyblue72, The Tiles, & Gina Chavez @ Walter’s on Washington

UPDATE:  Tha F%cking Transmissions are playing a warehouse party, 2010 Commerce tonight.  Starts at 9 and there is free beer.

SATURDAY

As always, your Saturday can get it started right with the Secret Show, which kicks off at 2pm at the Shady Tavern on 20th in the Heights. Just up the street from Cedar Creek and around the corner from Big Star Bar, this once lonely outpost of the North is now right in the middle of the hotness.  The Tavern has beer and wine and offers setups, so bring a bottle of your favorite.  There’s food most weeks, hot off the grill, and the bands usually number about three and play until five.  Maybe Mr. Secret will make an appearance in the comments and give us some clues as to who is playing.

Taste of Garlic

Tonight is definitely your night of rock and roll, with Broken Note Records stars Taste of Garlic coming together for a rare outing. They’ll be at Rudyard’s with Southern danger-core rockers World’s Most Dangerous and the Train Woodburns. Over at Fitz, where one might gererally expect Taste to be playing, Come See My Dead Person plays a second night in a row alongside alt-rockers The Courtesy Clerks and barrio punks Vatos Locos. Meanwhile, over at Warehouse Live Pasadena Napalm Division, a thrash metal outfit featuring members of DRI and Deadhorse will do their best to melt any remaining faces after openers Whorehound. Over at the Continental, Spain Colored Orange warms up the crowd for Graham Wilkinson and the Underground Township.

And certainly not to be overlooked, Pretty Little Flower (or PLF, which we were told they sometimes have to go by due to grinders not realizing how hardcore flowers can be) celebrates 10 years of Grind this evening with a show over at the White Swan including Dissent, Battle Rifle, and a band who’s logo we are having trouble deciphering, but we think is called 26 Beers.

Don’t feel the rock? Danse the night away over at Numbers, where Danseparc this month features their take on the best of 2008. Something Else? The Staff at the House of Blues is having a talent show. C’mon – you know you’re tempted.

Ahh. Much better.

FRIDAY
Toys For Tots Benefit with pretty much every band that was nominated for a Sammy @ The Mink
So yeah, originally our awards party was going to be Friday night, but we ended up having to change it because an obscene percentage of the good folks up for an award were already slated to play this gig (they thought of the children, we thought of the party – our bad). The show is $10, or you can bring a toy. Don’t be a cheapskate a pick something up at the dollar store. Go get one of those little awesome action figure things at Sig’s Lagoon – kids love that stuff and they you also get to goto Sig’s. If you’re having trouble reading the flyer, the acts playing are The Riff Tiffs, BLACKIE, American Sharks, Elaine Greer, Paleo, Giant Princess, Buxton, Death by Texas, Brett Taylor, News on the March, Wicked Poseur and Wild Moccasins. We’re told this is going to be done upstairs/downstairs style (a la Hootenanny) so there won’t be too many luls in the performance. Doors at 8pm, 21+

Something Fierce CD Release show w/Teenage Kicks @ Walter’s
Both of these bands are up for a Sammy as well (in the Favorite Punks category. Ooooh, Fight! Fight!) We’ve heard a few snippets of SF’s new full length and it goes without saying that it’s going to be a great record. You’ll definitely want to go to this show so you can pick up a vinyl copy of their previously online-only Modern Girl ep. Teenage Kicks never disappoint either.

ALSO:

• Ume, Linus Pauling Quartet and Red Leaves @ Rudyards (free)
• Battle Rifle, Chocolate Crucifix, Assholes and DJ Bill Fool @ Leon’s Lounge (free)

SATURDAY
SAMMIES SAMMIES SAMMIES SAMMIES SAMMIES SAMMIES SAMMIES SAMMIES SAMMIES SAMMIES

ALSO

• Free Press Christmas Party featuring Satin Hooks, The Eastern Sea, Piano Vines, Nick Greer, Ozeal & The Eulypians, Chase Hamblin and Female Demand @ Avant Garden
• Reprogram Multimedia Christmas Party featuring Spain Colored Orange, The Factory Party, BLACKIE, plus DJs Richard Henry, Yppah, Jeffery Mac, Paramour, Damon Allen, J. Calero, Dan Castillo and Ceeplus Bad Knives @ Bootleg Studios (2301 Commerce)
• Come See My Dead Person, Two Star Symphony and Whorehound @ Rudyards
• The Caprolites, The Trian Woodburns, & Novox @ PJs Sports Bar

SUNDAY
Trills the Season Toy Drive ’08, featuring Nosaprise, Lower Life Form, Spain Colored Orange, The Mathletes plus DJs Dayta and License to Trill @ Boondocks